Tuesday, January 29, 2008

no one should be thrown away.

i met Jane* this morning at a hair salon.
we ended up talking for quite awhile.
we talked about life and purpose.
my heart went out to her. there was something missing.
she seemed misplaced and a bit sad.

she asked me what i wanted to do with my life.
i simply told her i wanted to speak.
she kind of laughed at my response and then when she saw
that i was serious she immediately apologized.

i laughed too. it's not everyday someone just says that.
i said, i want to speak Truth and life.
i want to acknowledge people in their situations.
i want to encourage the sick of heart and disappointed.
then i made a statement that cut into her jumbled thoughts of this conversation she was having with me:

"so many people are just thrown aside. no one should be thrown away, no matter what they've done or what's happened."

she literally stopped what she was doing and looked to the ground.
when she realized that she had stopped everything she immediately began moving around again.
she muttered the statement: that's cool.

the morning went on and no one came into the salon.
it was just me and her and another girl who worked there.

at the end of my time there she told me to come back and see her again.
before i left she handed me her business card and with a smile
said : thank you so much.

Jesus is so beautiful.
His love is so real and wanted by so many.
they have it, they just don't know it.

we are His portion
& He is our prize
drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes
if grace is an ocean we’re all sinking
so heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss
& my heart burns violently inside of my chest
i don’t have time to maintain these regrets
when i think about the way
He loves us.

Sunday, January 27, 2008


i've had this certain song on repeat for the last few days.
it's soothing melody and his voice is something that stills the heart.

when i find a song that speaks to me [mostly speaks Truth]
i listen to it for days upon days.
i soak it up until my poor iPod is steaming hot and about to explode.

because i believe i need to be told [or listen] to Truth everyday.
because often times i forget the goodness of Love.
i forget what's really going on [even tho i don't really have a clue]
and who i really am and fall apart.

and this song, gently reminds me of the simplest Truth.

-I will not take My love away-
When praises cease and seasons change
While the world turns the other way
I will not take My love away
I will not leave you all alone
When striving leads you far from home
And there's no yield for what you've sown
I will not leave you all alone
I will give you what you need
In plenty or in poverty
Forever, always, look to Me
And I will give you what you need
I will not take My love away

& tonight looks like another sleepless one.
up all night writing, listening, wondering what's going on in Heaven.
weird. weird, little girl. get some sleep.

i feel like going for a drive.
i wonder who else is up in this town besides me.
tho i doubt i will, it's just a thought.
i wish there was a prayer room here, i'd be there every night.
and not be so alone on these restless nights.

ohhh the aches for community in my tiny life.
this is not ok. i have to be around people. i was not made to be alone!
soon this shall pass.... soon hopefully.


well, here comes the sun....