Monday, June 6, 2011


to look forward.
to anticipate.

It hit me on the plane.
Lately I've put a lot of expectation on many situations. I thought I'd finally find joy or feel love or be able to relax in those certain situations to the point where I sought those circumstances to bring those things to me.

Not the One who all those things flow from.

[so immature, can we grow up now please?]

I've found myself in a life I didn't expect.
Moments where the very things I expected least happened.
And feelings arising that I did not expect.

But here I am.

Here you are.

And this is life happening every day.
Breaking my heart deeper.
And finding healing in the least expected ways.

I must have hope in the One who makes all things right.
Who knows and does not expect.
Put trust in the protected and known future of my life.
Even tho it may be looking dim and He may seem far off
I will not put trust in my current situations.

I will expect love and hope and a beautiful future.
Because those have been promised.
And I expect know that promise will be kept.

Expectations and hopes may be dashed and ripped apart and thrown aside
but I will remain calm. I will continue to trust.